Rio: Flightless

Rio, is a tale of a 'domesticated' at the verge of extinction bird called Blue and his adventures/misadventures in Rio. The movie proves a very basic point that no matter how much you market an average movie, it still remains an average movie. Rio was supposed to be the next big animation movie but proves to be just another average happy go lucky, some good moments kinda movie. There are its own moments, but they are far and few. It gives you multiple opportunities to go out and grab some popcorn which essentially is not a sign of a great animation feature. Its not bad but just isn't cool enough. You may like it in parts and not hate it anywhere but still don't love it. To sum up, just your usual Animation feature with a couple of cute moments and largely average. Avoid if you can or take the kids along in a HAVE TO situation.

Blu is a Domesticated (supposedly last male Blue Macau on the planet) Bird which cannot fly. He understands everything 'human' and nothing 'birdly' and lives with his best friend/owner Linda in Minnesota. One fine day, an ornithologist Tulio comes from Rio and tells that in order to save the species they need to take Blu to Rio and make him mate with Jewel the last female Blue Macau. Linda agrees, Blue goes to rio, Meets with Jewel who is exactly his opposite, is fierce, loves freedom etc etc. Now the movie takes a Rom-Com Turn where Blu and Jewel hate each other first, then become friends, then fall in love, then fight, separate and then get reunited. Also throw in a few bird catchers who want to capture the last two blue macaus to sell them off and Beautiful Scenery of Rio and the Carnival etc etc.

The good part about the movie is the colors pallette used. The whole feel of the movie is very vibrant with the screen lighting up with the reds, blues, yellows, greens and is an absolute treat to watch. The Animation (given the current standards) is pretty amazing too. There are a few 'awww moments' here and there too, which come after every 10 minutes and you are not bored enough to leave the cinema hall. The characters are kinda cute, but none are remembered after leaving the hall, which i guess is the most important factor in the success of a animation movie. I mean you remember Shrek, Woody, Wall-E, Nemos of the world but not Blu or Jewel. Infact i had to google to figure out what was the name of the Female Lead :P

The bad part as i said that its just not good enough to remember anything about the movie per se. From the very start you know what the story is going to be like and the lack of 'OMG Moments' makes it kinda flat. There is no up down graph or a rollercoaster excitement anywhere. Its just too smooth for an animation feature. The characters don't stay with you when you come out of the hall. There is absolutely no edge of the seat excitement. The love is not lovey enough, the fun is not funny enough, the excitement seems too forced in and overall it looks more like a Rio Tourist Council advertisement rather than a 'story' about the Blue Macaus in love. The whole Rio bit is done a bit too much i guess.

Overall: Just an Average Animation Feature. Nothing too Great. Nothing too Bad.

Feel-O-Meter: 5/10

Irony of life explained by my mother: "Jab daant the to baadam nahi the, ab baadam hain to daant nahi hain

Q. Kiski patang kabhi nahi kat ti?
A. Ratan Tata, coz he's got all the MANZA

Look at the irony, with all those jokes on he can do this, he can do that. His name is Rajni-Can't

Sometimes i feel the word woman was misspelt. It was originally supposed to be woe-man

Everybody who's seen the fighter is requested to recall christian bale's full name. Im sure you'll burst laughing. :P
A. Dicky EkLund

The Fighter : Packs a Punch

The Fighter is not your typical 'Rocky' movie. Its not about training hard or rising when you are down type of a movie. It is hardly about boxing to be honest. Boxing just provides the landscape or the setting. The movie is more about the relationships between the boxer with his half brother, mother and girlfriend. Its about what happens outside the ring more than what happens inside. The best thing about the movie (as most of you would be aware already) are the performances. This is a movie which rides on the performances rather than the story or the direction or the script. Its individual brilliance that takes precedence. Especially Christian Bale. He is simply brilliant in his oscar winning portrayal of a Crack Addict Ex-Boxer Dickey Eklund. Take him out of the movie and its just an average hollywood flick. Include him in and its one of the finest ever. Watch it for Bale. You wont be disappointed. Treat to watch.

The movie is about Mickey Ward, a boxer (ill)trained by his half brother Dicky Eklund (Bale)and (mis) managed by his Mother (Mellisa Leo in her oscar winning role). How he has always been living in the shadow of the two and sometimes wants to break free and get what he deserves. On the other hand, Dicky wants his brother to win but is a crack addict and is not able to give him what he is capable of. The mother thinks she knows best but thats what she thinks and not what really is. Its about how they fall apart, almost ending Mickey's career and how they come together as a family again and (obviously) make him the champ.

Christian Bale is the reason, the movie is, what it really is. I am running short of adjectives to describe his performance. He plays the role of a crack addict Ex boxer Dickey minus the hamming of typical crack addict performances such amazingly well that you go oh my god. Moreover, his commitment to the character shows in his performance and especially the way he has moulded himself physically for the character. I am sure he must have lost 30-40 pounds (may be more) just to look like the character. He doesn't look like the batman we are supposed to identify with. The very first scene appears and you are like, what the heck, Is this Christian Bale? and That's the beginning. The movie just lights up whenever he is on screen. The best part (as already mentioned) is the subtelty by which he plays the role without the typical over the top crack addict portrayals. Another thing that strikes you about his performance is in the last 60 seconds when the 'real' Dickey appears when the credits are rolling and says a couple of sentences. Then you are like 'What the Fuck, he looks exactly like him and speaks exactly like him too'. This is the time you realize the brilliance of his performance. He has moulded himself physically, mentally and even speech-wise to match the real Dickey. This is when you realize the commitment of Bale towards the role. And this is when you feel the respect for the portrayal more than the adulation.

Mellisa Leo's performance also moves you but i am not sure if its the typical Oscar Winner. She was good nonetheless not sure if she deserves an oscar there since i haven't seen any of the other nominations' movies. Mark Wahlberg plays the his not aggressive, calm, serious role aptly and doesn't seem to overact and actually underplays his part which was kind of required as well. Amy Adams does a good job in her kind of possessive girlfriend portrayal too. But for me it was Bale all the way.

To be honest, apart from the performances, it was just about above average in every other department, no oh my god stuff in any other department. Though i must mention that i really liked the fight sequences shot in a typical 'real life boxing match' manner rather than being 'rocky-ish' larger than life and with slow motions and all. Really liked the straight forward manner in which the fight scens were shot making it look more like a documentary rather than a hollywood flick. Thumbs up there. But nothing great anywhere else, according to me.

Overall: A Must Watch because of Christian Bale's brilliant performance and commitment to a character

Feel-O-Meter: 8/10

Black Swan: Not a movie but an Experience

Okay first things first. The movie is one of the finest that i have seen in the past 5 years or even beyond. So if you want you may stop reading right now and start booking the Tickets. There is nothing about the movie i did not like. Every single thing. Every Single Frame. Every Single Twist. Every Single Turn. Screenplay, Direction, Performances, Cinematography, Art Direction, Background Score. Every single thing was absolutely perfect. Natalie portman delivers a once in a lifetime performance and is absolutely wonderful. This is one of the very few movies which actually got me so badly hooked that i had goosebumps and was almost trembling in excitement. It was as if the movie was taking place 'inside' me. Its like watching a play from the wings (if you havent been on stage then as if you are watching it from the first row). I can go on and on and on (and will) So just book it as soon as possible. Don't waste the movie on a DVDrip. Please watch it in a theater near you because that is where it deserves to be experienced.

Black Swan is the story of a ballerina who is trying to portray a once in a lifetime role of a white AND black swan. She has everything which takes to be the 'white' swan but does not have the darkness needed to be the black swan. The movie is about her being transformed from the white swan to the black swan on-stage as well as off-stage. How the play takes over her life and how the transformation takes place. How she goes from being her mother's cute little girl to a complete bitch. Now whether her real life is taking over her performance or her performance is taking over her real self. That is the question. This is just an introduction since i do not disclose much on the story in most of my reviews. Watch it to believe it. The story is a starting point where the brilliance begins.

As already updated, Natalie delivers the performance of her life. I mean its hard to believe that she is the same girl who once played Padme Amidala in Star Wars as a 15 year old youngster. She has matured so much and it shows. I cant think of anybody else who could have played the role better than her. May be Hillary Swank but she is too hard for the 'white swan' and NAtalie is just brilliant. She is so believable in the role. She has worked so hard on the part learning ballet etc and all her hardwork pays and shows on screen. Her performance takes the film to a different level altogether. *Respect*

The Screenplay is the next star attraction. The movie has some of the best edge of the seat moments. Last year i thought shutter island had the same magic but this beats it by far and i mean by far. Every single frame. Every single Twist and Turn is just purely magical. There are no 30 seconds where you could take a sip from your cold drink (which literally happened with me, i could not finish even half of my cold drink through out the movie). Absolute Gem.
The Direction is phenomenal, the art direction (especially given the fact that only white, black and pink were used mostly ) is superb and the background score was ohhh my god. There are hardly any other instrument except a violin and a piano is used and still it weaves such a magic around the film that it almost feels like the central character. I dont think the movie would have had such an amazing effect had it not had the most brilliant background score possible.
Overall : Its an experience rather than a movie. Absolutely brilliant from start to finish.

Feel-O-Meter: 10/10 (Yes, i couldnt find a single wrong thing about the movie so can't deduct a single point anywhere)

PS: I was so excited to write the review that i cancelled everything and rushed back home just to write the review. Though i watched The Fighter earlier than this but still thought this deserved to have been written about before :)

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Tanu Weds Manu: Rubbish, Trashy, Worst Movie of the 'Next' 5 years

TWM is one of the worst movies i have seen in recent times. For one, it has Kangana Ranaut who hams even more than Dada Muni in clerk and is absolutely the most irritating portrayal by any actress in Indian Cinema EVER. She is just absolutely rubbish. Then the movie has got no sense from start to finish. The Story is good on paper but then bad dialogues, worse casting, cacophonous music, hiccups-like narration spoils what could have been a good movie (given the good story). I can safely say that it is going to be the worst movie of the 'next' five years, given the fact that it is just not possible to make a movie as bad as this. Overall a Must Must Avoid at any cost. Even if the tickets are offered for free.

Okay, let me start with the good things first (only because there is hardly anything that i liked). Madhavan was very nice and sweet in his role which was supposed to be nice and sweet. The girl who plays Kangana's bihari friend was damn good. The Song Saddi Galli was rocking. The Story (on paper) was pretty neat. Hmmm.. Thats about it i guess.

Now coming to the problems. First and the foremost, Kangana Ranaut is not an actor in any sense of the word. She can only scream 'you baastaaaaaaad' and play a psychotic drug addict (which i guess is not 'acting' but her being her own self) and just can't do anything else (even with the new boobs she just got). She is so fucking irritating that she makes jimmy shergill look like al pacino. She just hams, hams and hams. Director: Kangana, look cute. Kangana Hams. Director: Kangana, look hot. Kangana:L Hms, Director: Kangana, laugh, Kangana : Hams. I mean that dumb actor has same expression for every fuckin emotion possible in this world (or even beyond). Her mere presence on the screen irritates you so much that you forget about any or everything going on.

The Dialogues are the worst in the past 10 years. I mean, even Joginder Movies have better dialogues than this piece of shit. Mithun's movies look like master pieces and literary art. I mean bandar-bandariya and what not was there and you seem to laugh your asses off (ok not really, since you get very irritated) at every emotional sequence throughout.

The Screenplay is shit too. Suddenly you are in one city, then hop to another doing a different thing altogether. Then back in some other city and the best part is the ending. I mean who the fuck wrote that, haan? Dolly Bindra? Yes, i am spoiling it for you by telling you what happens in the end since anyways i dont want you to go and watch this piece of trash. The two Heroes take Two separate baraats at the same time to marry the girl. And then one (supposedly) macho man takes out the gun to shoot the other and then one senti dialogue and he decides to sacrifice his love. Arrrrrrrrgh.. I wish that gun was pointed at me and boom.

Music is the most horrible and cacophonous music i have heard in a long time to the point that it doesnt qualify as music. (Except Saddi Galli ofcourse, which is more like an Item Song and is fuckin awesome). Every song is like An Arrow coming out of Arjun's Bow and just kills you word by word. Bad writing, Bad Music, Bad singing. Just plain Bad.

There is no direction. The movie runs as if the producers-cameraman-songwriter-chaiwala-spotboy all took turns to direct different scenes 'Chal ab meri baari' types. And the characters are just not in their character. I mean for god's sake, Jimmy Shergill is a lucknow guy who behaves like a Punjabi jatt for most and suddenly speaks a couple of urdu words to remind us, ohh haan he is from lucknow remember.

I can go on and on and on. But will stop here.

Overall: Worst movie for the next 5 years except Madhavan and That bihari girl's acting and Saddi Galli

Feel-O-Meter: 2/10 (To be honest, i soo want to give it a Zero but Madhavan ka chehra saamne aa jata hai isliye 2/10)

To be honest, if sense if humour was ACTUALLY on top of women's priority list. Raju Srivastav would have had the hottest wife and hefner would have been a loner.

iPad 2: Ab dugna geelapan sokhe (Taglines Gone wrong)

The way gadaffi is f**kin Libya, it should be declared as a cunt-ry

7 Khoon Maaf: Killer Instincts

7 Khoon Maaf is a dramedy which is another gem from (my most favorite director) Vishal Bhardwaj. Almost everything about the movie is brilliant. The Story is fresh, Characters are Iinteresting, Narration Quick, Direction controlled, Performances nothing short of fascinating. Even though you already know what's going to happen (Its not a brainer that she is going to kill all her husbands), the movie still keeps you interested as to How and Why it will happen. All the stories have nothing common nor anything is repeated anywhere which doesn't let your mind wander. Though i wish that there were no songs, neil nitin mukesh and john abraham, i am still a very satisfied fan. Must Watch.

The fact that moved the most about the movie was not its comic sense but rather the tragic story of Susanna. How she is just a simple girl trying to find her true love and Every single time she marries, she has that little hope somewhere that she might find her perfect match and live happily ever after. But life has different plans for her. I actually am very sympathetic towards the character since (as i said) just looking for love. How unfortunate she is, that something that everybody gets, she gets 7 times over but everytime she gets it, she has to end it herself. Imagine her pain every single time. That is something i really moves me in the story. I don't feel pity for even a single Man who is killed, but every time one is killed, A part of Susanna is also killed with him. Those 7 murders are not of susanna's husbands but of susanna herself.

As most would be already aware, the movie is based on Ruskin Bond's (who incidentally does a cameo in the movie as well) Susanna's Seven Husbands, where the lead character (obviously) kills her 7 husbands one by one. The thing to know is how and more importantly how. The movie is all about the curiosity of what's gonna happen next and more importantly what happens in the end. Is she a culprit or Is she a victim? Does she live happily ever after or behind bars?

The most important aspect of the movie (apart from the story and narration) are the performances. Every single Actor (yes please exclude Neil Nitin Mukesh and John Abraham here) delivers a power packed performance. Starting with Ms Chopra, She hasn't really been my favorite actress (none is to be honest) but i still prefer her to the sonams and deepikas of the world. To me, this should get her All the awards next year (category could be best villain or best actress depending on the jury's sensibilities) and (maybe) a national award too. She captures the essence of the character through all the different age brackets she plays. No points for guessing that Naseeruddin Shah and Irrfan Khan are fabulous too but the pick of the actors (out of the husbands) for me was Annu Kapoor. He is just simply amazing. Naseer's son Vivaan disappoints though. I just wish VB had taken a 'real actor' than a Star Son for such an important role given the fact that the movie moves further through his narration only.

Loved almost everything about the movie including the fabulous dialogues, background score, cinematography, set design etc except from the fact that i wish there were no songs. To me, the songs stopped the flow of the movie in between and were acting like commercial breaks in a cricket match. None of the songs actually add any value to the narrative (unlike VB's classic Omkara). Also, Neil Nitin Mukesh and John Abraham are absolutely waste of two stories. NNM should get a cue from this one that he just can't act especially in tough roles. His voice is just too squeaky, He is just too thin and girly for a manly role like a Air Force officer. John (despite his rock star image) didn't look like a rock star. Such a phenomenal character and opportunity and the bugger just wasted it. ANY other actor could have nailed it in the role. Anyways, i am still very happy about the movie despite these things.

Overall:  A Must Must Watch for VB's brilliance. Fabulous Narrative. Kick Ass performances and especially for Susanna

Feel-O-Meter: 9/10

PS: Would love to understand your version of the 7th husband given the fact that she just kills 6 once you watch the movie ;)

PPS: I am kinda too feely about the movie right now so the review might not appear coherent, grammatically correct or might even not make sense at all. Kindly adjust ;)

If Sachin is God, Sehwag is Devil. Atleast for the opposition

Thinks the phrase 'Apne PAIR pe kulhadi' chalaana would apply to most actresses. No?

Hawwjoke of the day: With the WAGs not being around, most cricketers will be doing kalaaiyon ka sahi istemaal off the field, no?

Patiala House : Hit Wicket

Patiala House is one of those movies which tries to combine two things Indians may die (as well as Kill) for. Cricket and Bollywood. Especially given that world cup fever is catching up, the timing could not have been better as well. But the bottom line is the movie has to be 'made' good as well. The movie had an absolutely amazing storyline. Terrific performance by Rishi Kapoor. But is weak on narration. The movie has its moments but which are far and few. It suddenly goes up and then drags along. Then again goes up and then drags along. Overall, One time watch but not exciting enough as you would have expected.

Patiala House is the story of a 34 year old Ex-Fast Bowler who has a stubborn, control freak father who has decided that his son will not play for England. The son doesn't play and runs a Department Store. Because of his father's attitude, All in the family convince him to go for trials and play for the country so that his father could let them live their dreams as well. This is the basic storyline with about 20 odd family members whom you can hardly remember or associate with.

The movie had a pretty interesting cast as well as the storyline but the script and direction killed it. The movie has its moments here and there, but they are far and few. You start enjoying the movie and suddenly it falls flat. Then it picks up and then again falls. In the end you are unable to decide whether you like this movie or hate it. There is nothing great to love, but there is nothing irritating about it so you don't hate it too. You somehow are 'just about satisfied' with how the things turn out.

The high point of the movie is Rishi Kapoor. He delivers an absolute cracker of a performance. You hardly expect him to play a stubborn sardaar ji and he does it with so much elan that you almost hate him for being himself. Deserves a nomination as the 'Best Villain' this year already i say. Anushka Sharma is pretty good too. She does well in her cute role and doesn't feel too crazily bubbly as well. Akshay Kumar was a waste since he hardly fits the soft spoken, scared middle aged  son's character. There is a new guy who plays Akshay's cousin (Puneet) is a newcomer to watch out for. I could see streaks of Prashant and KK Menon in his cameo.

The music (apart from a song or two) is absolutely rubbish. The background score wasn't too great either. Nikhil Advani seems to have his Kal Ho na ho hangover still and it was quite obvious in more than a couple of scenes. It looks like a Kal Ho Na Ho family in UK (in place of US). Could have made a pretty amazing movie out of the subject given the performances but it just is a 'decent' movie.

Overall : An Average movie which offers a few 'worth watching' moments but nothing great to write home about except Rishi Kapoor's performance. Feel Good movie which may be watched  (but only once) with family.


Feel-O-Meter: 6/10

Food for Thought: I think casting akshay was the biggest mistake. If only, there was (say) Hrithik Roshan in the lead role it could have been a different movie altogether. You like to see Akshay as a Macho Man doing wonders/stunts rather than being a meek soft spoken guy. I think Hrithik could have played the transformation bit very convincingly.

To be honest, I think it should be called valentine's night for obvious reasons

"Bhai, bhabhi to maal hai yaar" isnt exactly the best congratulations message to a friend on his marriage

Dear priyanka chopra, im sure now u'v realized that in india 7 khoon maaf ho sakte hain but tax evasion nahi

I was planning to write a post called '10 Reasons why i love Pamela Anderson'. And then i realized, why waste 8 !!

Dear Credit rating agencies, if you are Moody or your standards are poor. No wonder nobody gives a shit about what you say

Yeh Saali Zindagi: Guy Ritchie Masala with Indian Tadka

YSZ is a romantic comedy dramatic thriller which keeps you on your toes for most of its length. The story is very complicated and involves far too many characters you can remember. But its all worth it in the end. Its full guy ritchie's masala but in pure dilli style full of haryanvi slangs. Irrfan Khan is at his awesome best and takes the majority of the film's burden on his shoulder. Though gets slow in the middle when you are like, come on get over with it and tell me what's gonna happen in the end. But a Definite Watch nonetheless.

More than being complicated, the plot has too many things happening simultaneously. Too many 'ditching' one party and moving to another type stuff. Its a gangster movie with a dash of comedy, romance and also keeps that thriller angle to keep you on the edge of your seats. Well, let me try to explain. A loves P, who loves S, who is getting married to V a minister's daughter. K is a small time gangster married to S who works for B. B wants K to kidnap V and S so that he can be out of jail. C, the younger brother of B wants to kill B. Now K instead of kidnapping S and V, kidnaps S and P and A gets involved in the whole process. Now whether, if yes then how and who all live happily ever after is the trick.. Too complicated? Wait till you watch the movie.. OK, i am exageratting. It sounds too many stories and characters but its all fun and you hardly seem to notice these.

On the performance front, Its Irrfan all the way. Saurabh Shukla does well and Chitrangada (obviously) looks as yummy as she is. Arunodaya Singh is pretty decent and newbie Aditi Rao hydari is ammmmmazingly cute. Mind you, she acts well too, watch out for her. A Talent like Prashant is wasted in such a trivial role.

The highpoints of the movie is its pure and realistic treatment without getting boring. Its being true to the Dilliyapa. The locations, The dialect, the nuances, the words used, the gaalis, every single thing is exactly the way it happens. Its almost, as if you are witnessing events rather than watching a movie. Direction is grippy. Full points to the Dialogues as well as the complicated script. The Amazingly well written cuss words, anecdotes, advices are just out of the world and will leave you rolling in your chair laughing.

On the negative side, Backgrouns score is weak. Songs are pathetic. But hey the movie is not about songs and dance anyways, right? Gets a bit slow in the middle when storys after storys start getting involved and you are like, 'oh come on, nothing new now please, lets get it done and tell me what happens in the end' types. Crop by about 15 minutes and you have a cracker.

Overall: A Definite Watch especially if you are from north india/delhi and don't mind free flowing dialogue delivery with crazily funny cuss words.

Feel-O-Meter: 8/10 (Although some might find it 7, 1 extra for the wise one liners )

PS: The last 10 minutes are absoltely kick ass. Do not miss :)

Doesn't the kala ghoda festival sound more like an orgy invite rather than an arts festival :P

To girlfriend: yeh tera zikr hai, ya itr hai.... To wife: yeh tera zikr hai, ya FIKR hai ;)

"Quotes never make a person famous. Whatever a famous person says becomes a quote" - Gaurav Batla :P

Life would have been so much cooler if we had more comics than philosophers

127 Hours: Every Second counts

127 hours is indeed worth every second you spend in the cinema hall. Its much more than the bear grylls type 'adventure' that you expect. Its much more than the triumph of human will over circumstances. Much more than age old mind vs body debate. Its much more than the adrenaline rush that you expect. It IS all that plus much more. Its more to do with it the human emotions in the state of trauma. Its more to do with what are the important things in life. Its about loving the people around you. And overall, its about being thankful. Thankful to your loved ones. Thankful to life. Thankful to God in general to have given you the opportunity to 'Live'. It tells you that life is indeed a privilege and not something which is to be taken as a 'Given'. Overall, a must watch despite getting (just a tad bit) slow in a couple of scenes and (according to me) ill fitted Rahman Score.

The most brilliant part about the movie is its story (or the lack of it). I mean, a young adrenaline junkie falls into a crack in a mountain and his hand gets pinned to the wall by a falling rock. He is stuck there for 5 days with just a bottle of water and a 'Chinese' swiss knife and how he escapes. Compelling story on paper but the challenge is to portray this one line story on the big screen for one a half hour, with nothing but one actor. No flashy special effects. No 'Dramatic' performances. No hard 'O shit' moments. Sounds boring? Wait till you watch the movie. Danny does a superb job in taking this 'boring' story and weaving a tale of triumph of human spirit over circumstances. Nothing short of brilliance i would say.

Another thing which makes the movie work is its 'emotion-ness'. When you go for the movie, you expect this to be 'adventurous'. You expect some jaw dropping moments. Some kick ass action stuff. Some high flying jumps. Some adrenaline rush etc. But actually the movie is very emotional according to me. It just uses this tragedy as a medium. The message is much larger. The movie talks about being thankful to life in general. It talks about being with the family and importance of the things we take for granted. When you know you are going to die, THEN you think about the important things in life. These things are not THINGS but people and relationships. That was a key take away for me.

The movie also inspires you to do what you have to do in times of distress. Either you can leave things on fate. Or you make your own fate yourself. Sounds filmy? Well, the story itself filmy so how can the movie not be filmy! Anyways, i think apart from danny boyle, the movie is as good as it is because of James Franco. To be honest i had my doubts about his being able to carry off the burden of a movie where almost 99% of the screentime is given to him. There is hardly (or wait i don't thin there is) any scene where he is not on camera. But his goofiness, his free willy nature, his cuteness, his humour, his 'oh how can such a bad thing happen to him' irony makes the audience falls in love with his performance much more than the character. I'm not sure if he would be able to win an oscar for this performance but it is way up there no doubt. Kick ass performance by franco. I hope he lands in the big league after this.

The only thing i didn't like about the movie was its background score. I felt it was too much of a misfit in the whole narrative. The movie had its own feel and it was as if Rahman was composing for some other movie. I know most would think i am crazy to say such a thing about a score which has been nominated for an oscar. But it just didn't work for me. Or may be i am too big an Hans Zimmer Fan ! Also i think in the middle for about 10 minutes, you are like, 'OK this is getting kinda boring now' but then it comes back to its pace. Apart from these two things. Its as brilliant as it can be.

Overall : (Need i say?) Must Watch for the Inspiring Story and James Franco.

Feel-O-Meter: 9/10

Food fpr thought: What if Matt Damon was there in place of Franco? ;)

Weekend: The time that starts with a yippie and is gone in a jiffy

Dil to Baccha hai ji: Rubbish

Dil to Baccha hai Ji (DTBHJ) is an absolute waste of time, money and effort. The movie tries to be funny, romantic and emotional in different parts of the movie and fails miserably on each front. The script is boring. The direction bad. Performances are pathetic. Music/Background/Songs have absolutely nothing to offer. One of the worst movies i have seen in some time. Absolute Rubbish. Do not watch, even if you get tickets free.

The movie is about 3 room mates. A Divorcee, A 'Nice Guy' and A Playboy. The Divorcee falls in love with his junior in office who is 17 years younger than him. The Nice Guy is in love with a struggling actress who uses him for money. The playboy is a boy-toy for a socialite and then falls for her daughter. First a peek into their lives with (a failed attempt at) some humour. Then 3 love stories and some more un-funny sequences. Then the 'Cute' factor in the 3 love stories, then emotional sentiyapa and then revival.

The biggest problem with the movie was its confused nature. It tried to be everything and achieved nothing on any front. The funny sequences were not funny. The romantic ones weren't cute. The emotional sequences seemed (almost forced). Its as if the director was too bored of his 'realistic' cinema and thought of 'trying to be different' from his genre just to prove that he CAN do other stuff as well. But a miserable attempt nonetheless. I think he should stick to his strong points rather than wasting producers' and audiences' money.

On the performances front, Ajay Devgan does decent and Shahzahn padmsee is cute (as her character). I have always considered Omi Vaidya as a fluke since in 3 idiots he was not ACTING, the character itself was like him so he clicked. He is pathetic. No comments on Emraan Hashmi are required anyways. Nobody else even comes close to 'acting'

Music is HORRIBLE. One or two songs try to get you in the sweet romantic types mode, but you lose interest after 2 minutes. Nothing is special and after half an hour you are constantly looking at your watch. The pace is absolutely slow and the situations in the situational comedy are hardly funny. They are boring and irritating to say the least

Overall: Do not watch even if you get free passes. Stay home and watch a rerun of some DVD you have.

Feel-O-Meter: 2/10

With so many monday morning blues updates. Soon it will be renamed as mourn day

Dhobi Ghat: Clean but not spotless

In Every frame, Dhobi Ghat reminds you of arthouse cinema stuff. Its more like a play or a painting which is supposed to be appreciated in a certain 'mood'. It has a very realxed pace and does not hurry in its narration. It just takes things easy. Story is compelling. Cinematography is brilliant. Background score could have been better. Narrative Slow. The director at a lot of places gave preference to the 'direction' rather than 'story telling' so sometimes, you feel that you are watching a movie which tries too hard to be an 'artwork'. Aamir Khan is there just to draw the numbers. Remove Aamir Khan and too much stress on the 'artyness' and you have a winner. Watchable if you appreciate slow narratives.

To be honest, i had my doubts about the movie from the day i saw the first promo. I wasn't too impressed by it. Then, my facebook newsfeed was filled with 'Boring, Pathetic etc' type comments about the movie. So , i had some very low expectations. But the movie turned out pretty decent for me. I loved the simple storys. I think a maturer director and less emphasis on making a pseudo intellectual cinema, could have made it from good to brilliant. I just hope someone makes it again.

The plot revolves around 3 interconnected stories. One, where an loner artist Arun (Aamir Khan) shifts into a new house and he finds the earlier owner's camcorder discs in a daily diary form addressed to her brother telling him about her life in mumbai after she shifts here post her marriage. Second, an Investment Banker (yes, cliches are present here too) from US called Shy (Monica Dogra) comes to India on a sabbatical and meets Arun and falls for him. third, of a Dhobi called Munna (Prateik) who washes Arun's clothes, Meets Shy, become friends with her and then falls in love with her.

The best of the lot, both in terms of story as well as performance according to me was the most under-rated story/performance of Kriti Malhotra (who hardly gets a mention anywhere in the marketing too). Her monologues to the camcorder were so fresh that as soon as she goes off the screen you start waiting for her next video diary chapter. Aamir Khan was the most overrated and performs the worst according to me. It feels as if he has done this movie just because his wife directing it and he is also taken just to pull the audience to the theaters rather than character's demand. Prateik looks really cute in a couple of scenes. A couple of more films and you will have a 'Lambi Race ka Ghoda' in the Industry. Monica Dogra is good but there is nothing special that i could feel about her performance.

The film suffers on the Direction front. It screams, 'I am an artwork' in every frame. The director made it a too pseudo intellectual european cinema rip off at a lot of places, which according to me took away the soul of the movie. But makes an impact because of its Plot and its sweet-simple-ness. The background score although was good but i felt it could have been much better had an indian composed it. I think Kiran in her attempt to give it the 'International' marketing took away the could have been most important ingredient. Not a bad effort though for a first timer like Kiran Rao. I am sure she would come out with some brilliant stuff the next time

Overall: Definitely Watchable provided you don't mind the slow narrative and are in a relaxed mood to immerse into the 'experience'. Don't expect a thriller or a fast paced entertainer and you will not be disappointed. Not bad but not brilliant as well.

Feel-O-Meter: 7/10

Braking news: Post earthquake, cadburys changes its tagline to 'Have you felt TILT lately'

Sunny Deol = Punjabi Rajnikant

Its Mayawati's bday today. Request all to pls observe a 2 min silence on the occasion

Yamla Pagla Deewana: Go Crazy 7/10

YPD is one of the 'Keep your brains at home' movie which actually IS funny. Its full of spoofs and making fun of your own self moments. Add to that, A bit of confusion. A bit of romance. A bit of action. A bit of drama and you have a fulltoo bollywood masala which tickles your funny bone at more than a few occassions. May be about 20 minutes longer than it should have been and with bad (i mean really bad) music. Otherwise, a definite time pass comedy which makes you laugh without the 'embarassing to watch with mom/dad' moments. Clearly shows the difference between being stupid and being funny. Do watch with family.

To be honest, when i went to watch this movie, i had some 'supposed to be' funny movies in my mind which didn't turn out to be funny at all. I had thought that this would be another 'trying too hard' to be comedy which would have 2-3 laughable sequences, a couple of item numbers, double meaning dialogues and at most times irritating. But i was in for a pleasant surprise. The movie turned out to be a CLEAN comedy. No stupid Sardaar jokes despite being based in punjab.

The best part about the movie was its ability to laugh at the lead actors' previous works especially Sunny Deol. In every other sequence, movie tries to spoofify some movie or sequence or dialogue or mannerism of earlier movies of the deols. But thats not the only humour that's there. The lines are very witty, the timing is apt at most times, the humour doesnt seem to be forced, No slapstick, the 'situational comedy' just takes place by itself.

Sunny Deol rocks and i would really like to see him doing more comedies from now on. He takes care of the movie alone throughout the movie. A Surprising package for me was Mukul Dev, who does a very subtle Om Puri-ish (Remember his jaane bhi do yaaron bit) punjabi touch. Bobby does well given his acting limitations. Dharmendra obviously because of his old age is not able to give his best but tolerable none the less. Anupam Kher is pretty neat. Kulraj Randhawa does what she is supposed to do. Being Cute.

Although the movie could have been 20 minutes shorter to make it much tighter in narration but you can't really pin point which scenes should have been deleted because i found something or the other in every scene funny and that makes it really difficult to decide what should have been left out. Item numbers were absolutely unnecessary and should not have been there in the first place. Songs are absolutely rubbish and are the only irritating factor in the movie.

Overall, a very nice and clean comedy which doesn't take itself seriously. Makes fun of its own actors' cliches. Doesn't resort to the slapstick or double meaning dialogues only. Doesn't only TRY to be funny but IS funny as well. Go watch with your family

Feel-O-Meter: 7/10

No wonder paki cricket is screwed. With a (salman) butt at the top rather than the bottom, they even have the batting order in reverse..

I don't understand the song nazar k samne jigar ke paas. Pyaar ka lever se kya lena dena? or some connection with increased daaru consumption later?

The way ' wings' are used so frequently in sanitary napkins ads, pretty soon they will be competing with boeing and airbus

EditNo One Killed Jessica: Go and Witness :10/10

Let me warn you at the outset that the review is going to be very 'feely' coz i think this is one of the best hindi movies i have seen in recent times. The Story, Script, Direction, Performance, Background Score, Music. Everything is almost perfect. This describes what cinema is supposed to be and How stories are to be told. Need i say more? Just go and watch it tomorrow if you haven't done it already and if tickets are available.

This is a slap on the Dabanggs and Tees Maar Khans of the world who think that the audience wants to watch shit in the name of 'Entertainment'. Movie making as i see it is as basic as story telling and NOJK does exactly the same. It tells you a story. A Story which everybody is already aware of and still keeps you on the edge of your seat in every single sequence. A Story where you know what is going in the end but still immerses you in the journey and not the destination. Cinema is not only about mindless 'entertainment', it is also about showcasing our society, it is nothing but a mirror of our surroundings. and THAT is exactly what NOKJ does, in a hard core, non apologetic way. It shows us the dirt in our system and how people can give power and when time comes they can take the power back as well. All it takes is one joint effort.

The subject itself is so strong that even an average film could come out to be nothing short of brilliant, but the way the director takes the story to a different level altogether is mind blowing. The movie should bring out emotions in even the most cold blooded movie goers. Even to those, who hardly care about the 'storytelling' or the social significance of cinema. Hats off to Raj Kumar Gupta for keeping it real and maintaining the perfect balance between the commercial and the artistic parts. On one hand he takes two mainstream actors since otherwise the movie will not sell and nobody will come to the theaters no matter how good the movie is. On the other hand he takes an entirely new support cast, where almost no one has done any (noticable) roles earlier and takes out the best performance possible from their limited screen time or one or two dialogues only. I think more than an actors' film, this is an absolute writer/director's film.

Vidya Balan (as expected) does a very realistic portrayal of Sabrina Lal. Rani Mukherjee also does justice to her cocky/bitchy portrayal of the news anchor although at a few places you might feel that she is doing the bitchy bit a bit too much and it was all unnecessary. I just wish that somebody else was taken in place of (ex VJ) Neil for Vikram's role. Rajesh Sharma does well in his police officer role and a special mention must be made of a 2 minute dialogue of the guy who did Manu Sharma's role. Also the girl who portrays jessica does her part so well in the two or three scenes that she gets, especially in the flash back bits that you desperatly want her killer to go down in the end.

I also loved the unapologetic tone of the movie, be it in the usage of cuss words throughout the movie or mock the socialites like bina ramani or lawyer ram jethmalani. I think the movie is a slap on their faces as well. Throughout the movie, you feel ashamed of living in a society where a man kills a woman surrounded by 300 people and no one has the guts to just say the truth.

Although the movie could have been about 15 mins shorter but i guess i am ready to discount all that given the fact that someone atleast had the balls to stand up and show us our real face and does what movies are supposed to do apart from 'entertain' especially through some crazy writing. Some of the dialogues are so hard hitting that they show you the 'real' world that we live in. My favorite ones being 'Mujhe 1 Crore nahi chahiye, But Mujhe 1 Goli bhi nahi Khani' and 'Sab Khaate hain madam, but fark padta hai Kisliye'

Overall: A Brilliant start to the new year and a MUST watch at any cost movie.

Feel-O-MeteR: 10/10 (Yes, you read it write, i have written 10/10)

PS: Yes, I understand that on a 'movie' front its an 8/10 but for me just the fact that the movie plays its 'social' role in this case and is a brave effort in itself. The Subject itself counts for 2 extra points in my books :)

Gulliver's Travel: Lost from Start to Finish

Gulliver's travels is by far the worst Jack Black movie i have seen. It just did not have anything to offer at all. The Story obviously is known to the world. The Difference could have been made through the treatment and the script. The least we expect is that Jack Black touch which makes the movie from bad to atleast average and watchable. This fails on all counts. No Chemistry. No Funny moments. Mostly Boring. A Definite Not Go. Bad Start to the year i say.



Gulliver Travels is a story about Gulliver a normal mail man in a corporation who goes to Bermuda Triangle for an assignment he undertakes. He gets lost and meets 'Tiny' people there. Becomes their Hero. Then is thrown out. Then comes back to save his 'friends' and everybody lives happily ever after types. Add to that a couple of love storys, some jealousy the usual fairy tale type stuff and all. The work becomes all the more difficult if you already know 'what' is going to happen. Then you watch a movie to know 'how' it is going to happen. But that is where the movie fails miserably.



The most important ingredient in a funny movie is the 'fun' part. I mean even if the jokes are stale, it should atleast be fun to watch and the audience is not supposed to get bored to say the least. There is absolutely no excitement anywhere. There are absolutely no 'wow' moments. Nowhere in the movie you feel that you are watching a 'fantasy', everything just looks too usual. I think the movie is all about Jack Black and even he couldnt do anything given the pathetic nature of the script. There are just no funny lines.



I think the love story angle etc took away from the movie's essence as well. The graphics were all too lame as well. the 3D was the most stupid addition that one can think of. There was absolutely no requirement of 3D anywhere. The build ups to the fights was too much and the fights themselves were like 'what! its over?' types. They end before they even begin. The height of desperation comes towards the end where they even include an anti war song, which was like the nail in the coffin, which make you go WTF man.. Seriously WTF..



Overalll: An Absolute bummer. Not funny at all.



Feel-O-Meter: 2/10



PS: May be i missed the point altogether here. May be its supposed to be a Kids movie and they might really enjoy the not funny jokes and the JB antics. Didn't work for me. So if you have a kid at home whom you want to take a movie to. Can watch given the fact that there is nothing else in theaters for the kids right now.

The Tourist: Stay Home, this season

The first thought that comes to your mind when you are watching the movie is 'THIS movie got a golden globe nomination, that too in the best comedy or musical? I mean like seriously? The second thought: 'WTF! Angelina Jolie is also nominated as Best Actress, like seriously?' The Third: Johnny Depp is nominated too? and the final one: 'I think Golden Glones are fixed' That pretty much would sum up my feelings right now. The movie is just about below average for a one time watch if you are too desperate to watch a moviel, have free tickets and would definitely won't mind drooling over Depp/Jolie depending on your gender/preference. Apart from that on the 'movie' front. This one is nothing more than a 70s bollywood movie re-released in hollywood with a power packed cast.



To be honest, I wasn't too excited about the movie and had no plans of watching it. But i read in the papers today that it has received the above mentioned Golden Globe nominations and just wanted to have a look. And i absolutely regret my decision. The movie is nothing but sheer star power to draw audience to the theaters and thats all. Funny part is, that it is supposed to be a thriller and is nominated in the best comedy/musical category which proves that even the people who decided on the nominations were as confused as the audience as well as the film makers. Nobody seems to understand what the movie is all about. The movie also moves towards being a 'romantic comedy' towards the end too. The genre can definitely be classified as 'confused'. It appears that the movie was only supposed to generate buzz over the lead pairing with the supposedly hottest man and woman in hollywood and just survive a couple of weeks only on that buzz.



The plot revolves about a certain Alexander Pierce who has swindled more than $ 2 billion (yes, as ridiculous it sounds, it IS billion) from a gangster (who is after him) and since he also has not paid taxes on these earnings, the scotland yard is also after him. Nobody has seen him ever except Angelina Jolie, so the police and the ganster are after her also. Then there are twists and turns, plots and subplots but it seems nothing more than a 70s bollywood movie with absolutely no excitement or 'thrill' about it. The thrilling chase sequences are absolutely lame and there is no excitement about them. They match the pace of the movie too, which is dead slow. You start getting bored in the middle of the movie and just hope that it finishes already.



The chemistry between the lead pair is almost non existent. Angelina Jolie's 1000 times operated upon face (which btw looks nothing short of ugly) doesn't help the cause here as well. I think the role of 'M' in the current bond series would suit her more given the way she looks. Old that is. Johnny depps acts decent and is the only saving grace (to a certain extent only). He is the reason you don't get up and storm out of the cinema hall. You still wait till the end, which leaves you with nothing but an irritation. You are like WTF ! 'THIS' was the suspense. Oh Gosh, please shoot the writer will you.



Overll: A Below Average movie. Watchable only if you get free tickets. There is excitement at a few places but overall slow pace kills the impact.



Feel-O-Meter: 4/10

Dear New Year's Eve, I fail to submit to your consumeristic policies and peer pressure of 'celebrating' you after finding a place to 'party' after paying 10 times the usual charge. So have decided to do it old school (literally when i was in school) in a rajaai watching TV

Mom to my 4 yr old nephew: Kaisi ladki se shadi karni hai bhai? Nephew: Abhi thodi hogi, mere paas paise honge tabhi to koi ladki shadi karegi na !!

Somehow I feel santa claus is actually a sardar only.. Beard, paunch, head covered, dildaar banda distributing gifts, name also 'santa'. No?

Tees Maar Khan: Bad Joke, Hasoon?

As you might have guessed by now that the title of the post is borrowed of one of the dialogues of the movie. TMK is one of those movies where in you hardly have any expectations anyways. What you are looking for, is pure mindless 'entertainment'. Now the definition of this 'entertainment' as per our dear farah khan (and loads of other directors) is obviously Slapstick, Trying too hard to be funny actors, Spoofy Screenplay, Goofiness, People Slapping each other, plain simple craziness all over etc etc. And exactly thats what the movie offers. The two most enjoyable things about the movie were (Obviously) Sheila Ki Jawani and the End credits. There are a few jokes here are there which are funny but overall a pretty ordinary school-college spoof type movie. Can watch once if you can tolerate the irritating slapstick with absolutely no logic.




OK, First lay the expectations right. I obviously did not expect the movie to be in the same league as the 'intelligent comedies'. Yes, Ms Khan Comedies can be intelligently done as well and only people falling over each other, actors making strange faces and hamming, Jokes cheap borrowed from twitter oneliners or (even wors) roadside PJs do not constitute Comedy but obviously you don't believe in that and I already know that you don't. So the expectations were right where they should be. Go in the hall, Watch sheila ki jawani, enjoy some really sad/irritating/pathetic and sometimes funny jokes. Ignore the stupidities, hamming, slapstick, absence of story/script/direction. Forget about your life's problems for 2 hours and just laugh. If you find the stupid jokes funny then at the joke, If you don't, then at the director treating the audience as 5 year olds. In any case, just lay back and enjoy. And the movie fairs pretty decent if your expectations are right.



The Performances are just over the top and given the fact that the script is just about gags, the actors couldn't really do anything anyways. Upar se you have Katrina Kaif and Akshay kumar, both of whom hardly qualify as 'actors'. So even the remotest possibility of a 'performance comedy' is thrown out of the window as well. Infact, i feel if you had ANYBODY apart from these two. Their roles could actually have been delivered in a much funnier way. But i guess you can't really ignore the two box office magnets. Akshaye Khanna was the pick of the lot according to me and he portrays his role perfectly well. He is not given 1/4th the bhaav that Akshay Kumar gets but he still is miles ahead of him as per far as 'performance' is concerned. Ali Asgar doesn't disappoint either.



Enough has already been said about Sheila Ki Jawani and the number just takes off to another level in a cinema hall. I mean, i think 30% of my ticket price was already vasooled after the song. One Word: Woww . The title track is pretty decentish but all the other songs are absolute trash as if Vishal Shekhar were only asked to compose one item number and the rest were done by Farah Khan's Triplets.



Not to say, that the movie doesn't have its funny moments. There are actually a couple of scenes, which no matter how stupid they seem, are able to tickle the funny bone, especially when Akshay Khanna is on screen. Two or Three dialogues were actually quite witty too.



Overall: The usual 'Star studded slapstick Trashh' but with some actually funny sequences here and there. Watchable if your expectations are in the right place and you are gonna laugh either at the scene or the director. Watch it for Sheila and the End Credits



Feel-O-Meter: 5/10 (2 for Sheila included)



PS: Yes, Most might thing why i rate it higher than a Dabangg. The problem with Dabangg was that I just did not find ANYTHING funny in that movie. In this case, there are a couple of sequences, where you actually burst out laughing.

Ques. What would be Sri Sri Ravi Shankar's username if he joins twitter? Ans. RT_of_living

#BrakingNews: Karan Johar planning a sequel to MNIK. Ropes in Anil Kapoor. To Call it My Name is La-KHAN

Jobs are like Wives. Hamesha Saath Wale ki zyada acchi lagti hai :P

If Dolly-Khali were a couple, the show would have been called "Bigg Boss D-K".. no? :P

Phas Gaye Re Obama: Get Kidnapped

Phas Gaye Re Obama is one of the very few 'good' comedies this year. It makes a point loud and clear that you are not required to be goofy/slapstick/stupid to tickle the funny bone. You don't have to resort to crazy antics to be funny and people can laugh off the script as well. Witty dialogues, Believable Performances, Topical Story, Crisp Narrative makes it one of the funniest movies this year. Must Watch.




PGRO is set in the post recession world wherein an (almost) bankrupt NRI comes to India to sell off his ancestral Haveli to save his mortgaged house in the US. First he cannot get a buyer for it because of recession in India and then he is kidnapped by the local gang since they think he is still the millionaire he used to be. The story about how he is passed on to the bigger and then even bigger fish in the kidnapping 'business' and how he comes out of the situation every time with an 'idea' and also pays back his mortgage through the 'ransom' money he himself was supposed to pay. Brilliant story, Crisp Narrative and Amazingly Well Written dialogues make it the best written comedy this year.



On the performance front, Although everybody has delivered a good performance, Manu Rishi and Sanjai Mishra were the best of the lot. Somehow i wish that there could have been somebody else apart from Rajat Kapoor playing the US return businessman because of the cunningness associated with his 'ideas'. Its hardly believable that a person like Rajat Kapoor can come up with such 'witchy' plans. But its to do with his image rather than his performance. Neha Dhupia seemed a misfit and appeared as if she is there just to draw crowds by increasing the glam quotient.



On the negative side, the movie becomes repetitive when the cycle of transfering the kidnappee from one gangster to the other is repeated. May be one of the transfers could have been avoided and Amol Gupte's unnecessary Piles problem seemed like a misfit and forced to create some moments which the movie was already full of. Could have avoided these two things. Cut the movie by 15 minutes in the middle and you have a cracker of a movie. Could have been in the same league as Khosla, Oye Lucky etc, but is pretty good even now nonetheless



Overall: A Must Watch for everybody looking for a topical and clean comidey. Satire at its best.



Feel-O-Meter: 8/10

Tron Legacy: Game On

Tron Legacy is one of those movies which start like an absolute cracker and then somehow get lost in the middle with some heavy duty 'filmy' stuff. Don't really bother about the storyline because the movie is more about the 'coolness factor' and special effects rather than why is this happening. Some of the action sequences are really neat though remind you of the star wars and the matrix at more occasions than one. The background score is killer and (yes i am saying it now) can be compared to hans zimmer's the dark knight. A Definite watch for adrenaline junkies and sci fi lovers especially if you are looking for 'cool' special effects and a killer background score leaving the story and logic aside.



Tron is about a computer games developer who gets sucked into an alternate reality world (created by him only) and never returns and how 'accidentally' his own son gets sucked into the virtual world, where he fights a battle to rescue his father and his (future) love interest (if a sequel comes out) from a 'program' (which looks like his father).



The movie is all about how cool the sci fi stories are. It takes its inspiration largely from Star Wars and the Matrix. Even the costumes look too similar to the epics. The Hero's father looks like obi van and the villain looks like darth vader. There are references of calling the virtual grid as the 'grid' (The matrix types) and then even the bad guys are nothing but 'programs' (Agent Smith types). But the movie definitely takes the concepts a couple of steps further by redefining 'cool'. The costumes, the cars, the bikes, the interiors are just killer and you go 'wow' at more than one occassion.



The word 'awesome' falls short of describing the first fight sequence. Small sticks transform into bikes by clicking a button and every turn you go 'wow'. Sadly post this sequence the movie goes into a boring description of what happened, why it happened, how it happened etc etc. And you almost feel like going out and grabbing some popcorn. The movie just doesn't go anywhere from there. You keep expecting it to surprise you even till the end but it doesn't.



If you have to take one thing out of the cinema hall that is the background score by Daft Punk. With all those techno sounds in the fight sequences and heavy opera style score while approaching a fight scene, it reminds you of Hans Zimmer's The Dark Knight score at more than a couple of places. I think the movie would have fallen flat on its face, had the sound track not been as good as it was. Makes the movie, A Definite watch from a 'Watch it on TV'



Overall: The movie is pretty good when it comes to the action sequences, the 'cool' factor and the background score and scores really bad on the story/script/direction front. A Definite watch if you are an adrenaline/sci fi junkie. Avoid if you are not.



Feel-O-Meter: 6.5/10

Braking News: Censor Board censors the use of 'Sheila' in Sheila ki Jawani. Farha ropes in Bobby Darling for the new version. Song to be called 'Dheela ki Jawani'

Braking News: Censor Board censors the use of 'Sheila' in Sheila ki Jawani. Farha ropes in Bobby Darling for the new version. Song to be called 'Dheela ki Jawani' :P

Band, Baaja, Baraat: Not Aiwayein Aiwayein

BBB is one of those movies which provide you with a fresh feel of debutant director movies. Its a regular rom-com with the only difference being in the setting of the plot. To be honest i only watched this movie only because of the aiwayein aiwayein song and was not totally disappointed with the movie as well. Everything seemed okay and neither the movie brings the house down and nor does it totally irritates. Its one of the movies where you just can't seem to make up your mind. For the regular north campus grad, a Definite watch. If you are not a Delhite watch it to get the flavour. If you are a delhite, don't expect a lucky oye or khosla. Watchable.




Well, I never like movies like BBB since they fall into the usual 'not bad' category. I mean neither can you fall in love with the movie or the characters nor can you absolutely hate it. This is the kind of cinema which just comes and goes away and in six months you probably won't even remember the movie. The worst part is, there is typically nothing to mention about the movie while writing about it.



Movie revolves around two DU grads, where Anushka wants to start her own 'wedding planning' business and Ranveer just doesn't want to go back to his native village. They start the business together. Fall in love. Have a fight. Break Partnership. Come back together. Realize and Stay together. Typical Rom-Com? Kinda yes. But the overall 'Dilli' setting makes up for the lack of originality/new-ness.



The movie does have that typical 'debutant director feel' where you can feel that the guy is actually giving his heart and soul to make the movie. Especially the first fifteen of 'Dilli Darshan' was just so 'dilli-ish'. Especially the college sequences in 'Tarkeebein' was absolutely typical north campus. Maybe i have this DU/North Campus bias and its just the nostalgia speaking but to be honest, the first half an hour for me was the most enjoyable. But i think to keep the movie fast paced, he wraps up the 'fun part' way too quickly. And then the regular rom com ingredients of milna-bichadna-phir se milna takes over and spoils the fun. I would have prefered some more 'ladai-jhagda' between the lead pair.



As far as the performances go, I think Ranveer is going to be a stunner in the films to come. Although he couldn't do justice to the role of the Regular DU Jaat (but i am sure most who aren't from DU won't even realize it) you could still feel the potential. A better suited role (may be an action hero) and you will see what i mean. As far as this movie is concerned, he looked like 'Gareebon ka Vivek Oberoi'. I still don't know if i like Anushka sharma or hate. Coz be it Rab ne.., badmaash company or this movie. I mean she just doesn't do anything for me. she doesn't feel like a bad actor but she just doesn't evoke any emotions through her performance. Same is the case with this movie. I think the role was so well written, anybody else could have just ripped the screen but she just again manages the average performance types.



Must mention that Aiwayein Aiwayein is an absolute kick ass track and aadha paisa vasool is done by the song itself. Tarkeebein is a bonus and these two songs along with the addictive BBB signature tune makes up for the rest of the 'can be ignored' songs. Totally worth it.



I think the second half could have been much shorter and the movie had almost starting to bore me. The whole freshness was almost washed away in the second half. The anger, the fights just seemed too frivolous and forced. I think the problem was with the actors. Had there been anybody else apart from the lead pair, it could have become an above average, but in this case, just the regular average easily forgotten movie for me.



Overall: Neither too bad to skip, not too good to cancel all the plans and go for it. Go if you are free and especially if you have studied at north campus. The first half hour will provide you oa full paisa vasool. May even come back after first half and go have some chinese at momo's point



Feel-O-Meter: 5/10



PS: (In a remote possibility) if you read my reviews, you must be aware that i typically don't give these average 5 type ratings but i still can't decide if i liked this movie or hated it. So have to stick with a 5 :(

Whoever said, 'Bin maange MOTI mile...' Must have had a very fat wife :P

Lesson of the Day: Negativity Kills Creativity

Q. What's a prostitute who doesn't charge for sex called?
A. Missionary of charity :P

Me: Ohh.. Hey Dude.. Hows you? Long time.
Friend's Friend: Sorry yaar, pehchana nahi.
Friend: Arey he is Gaurav, He was at KJ Som, Mumbai. Remember, he came home one day?
Friend's Friend: Ohhh yeahhhh... You came with BATLA right??
Me: *Stumped* i AM batla

Cadbury's: Shubh Aarambh Series

Cadbury's has always been known for some of the most brilliant advertising in Indian landscape. Who has forgotten the 'Kuch Khaas hai Zindagi mein' ad in the 90s. The last 'Kuch Meetha ho Jaye campaign' was just just mindblowing to say the least. It gave the brand a new driection altogether. But the shubh Aarambh series according to me are absolute rubbish when it comes to execution. I know most are going gaga about these ads and may be i am the only one who thinks otherwise, but thats the way it is. According to me, it was one of the most amazing ideas to take the brand forward after the chocolates can replace sweets during festivities bit, and 'new beginning' association enlarges the overall consumption spectrum by leaps and bounds too. Involving families rather than only stand alone consumers in the user profile. But i think the ads are poorly executed and the product usage/appeal seems too forced.

I mean i can understand a father's concern for his daughter and her boyfriend's maturity. But would ANYBODY say that cheesy tagline. I mean even if he is very understanding. Still. Would he discuss a PRODUCT in such circumstances. Just too forced as per me.



Same is the case with the earlier 'Bus Stop' Ad. Product just doesn't seem to fit in the overall scheme of things. Great Advertising either has a shock value or goes too smooth and you don't notice the AD per se, but the moment. Doesn't do the trick for me.



Even the Jeans ad looks very promising on paper but when it comes to execution, doesn't seem to be as moving/appealing as the idea itself.



Also, if you DON'T like the bus stop ad, i am sure you will love THIS spoof



Share your views if you agree/disagree.

Braking news: inspired from sheila ki jawani, BSP launches its own campaign song. To be called Maya ki Masti :P

Braking News: Mollywood protests against #sheilakijawani. Set to launch rival item number called shakeela ki jawani ;)

Guzaarish: Don't expect 'Black' Magic

Guzaarish is one of those movies, which rests on the very idea of making people cry through suffering and it succeeds to a large extent as well. There are a couple of scenes which shake you down but those are not enough to hold your attention throughout. It was a great idea on paper and it had that bhansali touch of grand sets, dark cinematography, use of whites, greys and blacks all over the canvass (although Red is an addition this time around) 'Black' style, stars who can sell movies just by their names, some really good actors in cameos, but there is something lacking. May be it tries too hard to do a 'Black' but sadly doesn't match up in any sphere. The first half was pretty neat and grippy but suddenly the second half felt like a different movie altogether and the last 20 minutes were just so unbearable. Can Watch for some really 'scenes' which make you cry though don't expect some 'black' magic.



The plot as most would already be aware revolves around Euthanasia(Mercy Killing), wherein a quadriplegic ex-magician Ethan (Hrithik) files a petition in the courts to allow him to end his life. Either the story seemed confuse or i couldn't understand the plot because the script makes the characters jump from one end of a viewpoint to another with in sequences. Hrithik at first is a person who thinks life is a gift and actually has written books on the topic. He delivers lectures on positivity and runs a radio show on the same lines. And Suddenly in the second scene he decides to kill himself. Anyways, the story and the helplessness of the lead character is touching to say the least but sudden changes in ideologies don't add to the narrative's consistency.



Performance wise, Hrithik's acting is mind blowing in a couple of sequences and suddenly you go, 'Dude, he's the man' and suddenly in the next sequence he would start hamming so bad that KRK seems like an Oscar winner. Though i feel that given this year's other films, Hrithik could easily take home a couple of best actor awards. Aishwarya according to me was a perfect mis-cast since she just looked too plasticky and emotionless (i am not sure, if it was deliberate from her end or she just ended up being like that). You just couldn't feel her love for Ethan throughout the movie. The winner according to me was Aditya (Yeah, ex-channel v vj aditya) who seemed so comfortable with the character he was playing. His performance was just too smooth to ignore. Others do justice in their cameos so no problems there.



On the direction front, i think SLB is trying too hard to go the german, french, italian cinema way. It appears as if he made this movie not for the story or the script or the indian audience, but to show the 'world' that he is a technical genius. I think he overdoes a lot of things, from victorian era sets to strangely dressed actors, just for making it feel 'different' from regular bollywood stuff. Too much of everything is bad and this is a prime example of the same.



Music is HORRIBLE to say the least. It is just one of the worst scores i have heard in recent times and definitely a let down. I think SLB was too busy showcasing his genius that he forgot that movie making is a team effort in the end.



Although, i must mention that there are 3-4 sequences where you just cannot hold back your tears or can feel Ethan's agony in your own soul. Those scenes just rescue the movie from the trash it could have been. For me, especially the sequence where Ethan sings 'Its a wonderful world' after his mother's death just nails it completely. Show me sequences like those and i will watch the movie again only for those. Hrithik just takes the movie suddenly to a different level altogether and those are the high points of the movie.



Overall: A Brilliant Story lost in SLB Grandeur. A pretty grippy first half but seemed to lost its way completely in the second. Watchable for 3-4 damn neat sequences which make you 'almost' cry.



Feel-O-Meter: 5/10



PS: I felt so bad for monikangana dutta, She is such a big supermodel and here, she was given 1 dialogue, 1 kiss and (i think) at max 2 minutes of screen time. As if the director got so angry with her that he cut her whole part or something.

With pamela entering bigg boss' house, now we have TWO very important reasons to watch the show. No? ;)

Come to think of it, a Happy Parents' Night is responsible for a Happy Children's Day :P

The Social Network: Accept the Friend Request

No points for guessing but The Social Network is easily one of (if not THE) best picture this year. It is exactly how cinema is supposed to be. No High flying cars, No over the top drama, No 3D or 'special' effects. Its the script, the dialogues, the characters, the direction, the acting and above all the pace. The movie is gripping and there are hardly any moments that let you wander your mind away. From the first scene onwards, although you might be/are are aware of the 'story' but its how it unfolds that makes it interesting. Everything about the movie was almost perfect. It stays with you after you walk out of the cinema hall just like alcohol. It slowly gets to your mind and stays there. The best part is, The Hangover stays. A Must watch, whether you are on facebook or not.



The Story (as all are aware) is about facebook founder, a 23 year old and world's youngest billionaire Mark Zuckerberg and how facebook became a worldwide phenomena. More than the story of facebook, the movie illustrates the relationships the founders share, the ruthlessness that comes with being an entrepreneur and the biggest irony that the person who united the world through one website making everyone connected with each others' friends, he himself didn't have any. He was a complete loner and remained till the end. THIS irony is something that i truly loved. How he got everyone connected but still remained disconnected. How he is lonely amongst 500 million friends.To me, THATs what the movie was about rather than a documentary.



The script is edge of the seat without the 'forced drama'. No hard hitting fights between friends, no emotional betrayal, no remorse, no crying. Exactly as the life. No exaggerations. That according to me made the movie it is. The subtleties make it a class act. Because of the same, you can relate to all the characters and identify with their motives and antics. You don't go 'aah.. thats not possible' anywhere. May be its largely because its NOT fiction but hey aren't we used to masala in non fiction as well? Also, i simply loved the ending, it just makes the irony of the loner with 500 million friends so glaring. Just superb. How the movie comes full circle. Brilliant. I will not be too surprised if there is an oscar nomination on the adapted screenplay bit.



The Dialogues were just crazy. I think this could be one of the few movies you could relate with the dialogues that will be repeated for some time to come and. Another thing to notice was the speed at which the dialogues were being delivered as if the actors were trying to meet the pace of the movie itself, which was another highlight of the movieThe movie just runs away without any hiccups and nowhere you had this 'ohh you can skip it' feel. It was among some of the most perfectly paced movies i have seen in recent times. Neither too long nor too short. Everyone performed their part amazingly well, but i somehow loved Justin Timberlake the actor the most out of the lot.



Overall: To be honest, I can't really think of any negatives as of now. May be if i watch it again. I might notice a few problems here and there.A Must Watch even if you are not aware of 'the facebook story'. The movie in itself is pretty engrossing. Just book the tickets and go.



Feel-O-Meter: 9/10



PS: May be i am too much of a facebook fan, but here i am only writing about the 'movie' and not the social phenomena that mark and his friends founded. BTW, i think Mark as a person is an absolute failure and a cunning bitch himself but just loved the entrepreneur in him.

Golmaal 3: Dear Mr Shetty, Please learn from your Comedy Circus Contestants

What's the bad thing about a joke? No matter how funny it is the first time, It ceases to be if you hear it again and again. The same is the case with the Golmaal franchise, I think the first movie was a laugh riot and an absolute cracker of a comedy. One of the best in the last 10 years according to me. But then, the second was a little lesser and the third one seems just like a reflection of the last two. Rohit Shetty is riding a tiger called the Golmaal Franchise. He didn't know what to do and was too afraid to let go of the same. So he decides, Hey why not cash in on the brand recall. Atleast people will watch it once and it will be a hit anyways. And Eureka ! Exactly thats what happened.



Let me clarify that i am a HUUUGE fan of mindless comedies. The kind of movies where you can forget logic/sense and just have some fun. But the most important thing to keep in mind is that a comedy is supposed to be funny. I am sorry, but dogs biting people's asses, rockets burning down fireworks' shops, or people on a chaat wala tawa screaming are not funny to me now. Especially given the fact the last two instalments were funny not only due to the antics but due to the script part too.



The punches are pretty neat and topical but the thing that lacks is a common threat that binds the movie together. The 'plot' is not there. Its as if the director says, 'Who Cares about the story anyways right?'. I agree, that it doesn't have to be a heart warming story but even a very basic thread that binds the overall progression of all of whats happening on the screen is a very important requirement and THAT wasn't present. At 2.5 hours, it was too long for a comedy without a plot to sustain.



The movie just seemed like different Comedy Circus contestants coming together and making a movie. Where its not a 'movie' but rather a collection of different 'acts'. And ya, Mind you, the contestants on the show are FAR FAR funnier than ANY of the actors/writers/director of this 'comedy'. I think the 'judge' needs to learn a lot more from the contestants there.



Have you noticed that a number of times these Stand up comics come together, make a movie and nobody watches that. THATs also mindless but has brilliant comedians (much better than our movie stars) and still the movie is a flop. The reason nobody wants to watch these contestants on the big screen no matter how good the plot/script could be. Its like a reverse process in this case. The actors are bad, the script/plot is not existent but still it works because its the 'Brand' that sells.



The two things good about the movie were 1. Addition of Kunal Khemu, who provides some freshness to the stale cast. and 2. Some REALLY funny and topical punchlines.



Overall: A Mindless non-comedy. Give it a Miss. A couple of funny scenes here and there but definitely not worth spending 2.5 hours (Even if the tickets are sponsored)



Feel-O-Meter: 4/10

Dear Operations management graduate, "You are six sigma compliant" isn't exactly same as "darling, you are one in a millon"

Chunnu Munnu The do Bhai.. J&K par hui ladaai..
Jhagda sunn kar Pappa Aaye.. Dono ko do chapat lagaye.
Na aadha lo tum Chunnu beta, Na aadha lo tum munnu beta.
Aisa Jhagda karte rehna, Mera Thenga Chooste rehna.

*In loving memory of the THE president of the united states' visit to India

Nobody bothers about the old. Sab 60+ uncle logon ko Diwali ki hard-d**k shubh kaamnaayein :P #hawwjokeoftheday

Given my salary, today should be called Dhan-Taras instead. :( #happydhanteras

Rajni's laws apply to murphy

‎#Brakingnews: dibakar banerjee plans a sequel to LSD. Names it love, sex aur KLPD

Holding onto the most favorite thing, the sweetest one the king of the king.
You were the best I had, you were comparable to none.
A sudden push and the world shattered, rest in peace, oh my CK ONE :(

Har kamyabi ke peeche kisi ka haath hota hai. Aur Nakamyabi ke peeche kisi ki ungli :P

Niagara falls, viagra rises ;)

Baawara Mann Dekhne chala ek sapnaaa... Inception Dekhi aur confuse ho gaya :P

Braking news: maneka gandhi launches campaign against mosquito repellants.. Goes all out against allout

'Normal' friendship follows 'normal' curve

Braking News: Playboy gets inspired from Amazon's Kindle. Launches its own porn ebook reader. Calls it Fondle

‎38-27-36.. Now that's a medal's tally even bipasha would be proud of.

*Commonwealth games

Braking News: Pratibha Patil woke up all scared last night. Sources claim she saw a nightmare, Kalmadi calling her Shivraj Patil in the closing ceremony

Anjaana Anjaani: Perfect Rom-Com

Well, What do you expect when you are going to watch a Bollywood Rom Com? Cat Fights between the leading pair (who more often than not are exactly opposites) in the first half and then some lovey dovey chemistry in the latter, Some Cute moments, Some Stupid but funny sequences, Thoda sa Romaaance, Good music/songs, Decent Direction, Story, Script and a lot of 'those' moments which just make it neat. Right? And that's all is there in Anjaana Anjaani. Should watch (Preferably with your boyfriend/girlfriend/prospect).



Every Rom-Com has to have those 'moments' which make you smile and AA has its own share of these moments. The movie is (obviously) about two strangers meeting, both of them are trying to commit suicide and then try to 'live' before they die. Then comes the usual Rom Com stuff with full on Ladna Jhagadna, Pyaar ka Ehsaas hona, milna, bichadna,Thoda drama, Realization hona, Phir se milna, etc. Same old formula with the difference being that the leading pair is Simple Story. The only difference could be in the 'treatment' and there is. The movie has its own 'fresh' appeal despite you already knowing what would happen. Even though a couple of sequences seem slightly forced or predictable, you still enjoy the package overall.



One of the most important reasons of AA working is that i think the roles suited both the leading actors just perfect. Priyanka Chopra is her own bubbly self and you can't escape having a smile on your face when ever she does(or even overdoes) her smiley part. For Ranbir Kapoor, the actor, i already have tremendous respect among the future super stars of bollywood. Every role that he plays seems written for him. Be it his serious role in Rajneeti or loserish lover in Amar Prem ki Gazab Kahani or even the sardaar in Rocket Singh. In AA also he doesnt disappoint at all. He is as smooth as you can get. Full Marks to both of them there. Even if they are good on stand alone basis, i think they become better when it comes to their chemistry. They come across as friends on screen as well as off screen. Either they are, or they are just pretty good actors. Others anyways have no role to play so no need to mention anybody.



Music is plain simple Kick Ass. Almost EVERY song rocks. The range in the album is pretty broad too which could be explained by the variety of singers on the sound track. On one hand you have Rahat Fateh Ali Khan with his soulful sufi in Aas Paas Khuda and on the other you have Shekhar/Shilpa Rao with their jumpy title as well as I feel good tracks. You have mohit chauhan's melodious voice in tujhe Bhula Diya on one hand and on the other you have lucky ali in his rockish avatar with Hairat Hai. Though there are a couple of songs which seem ill fitted in the narrative, but Overall, i think the sound tracks adds to the overall feel of the movie and makes it a better from a good movie.



To be honest, there was hardly anything which i had a BIG problem with. Its one of those movies, where you just go to have some easy masala entertainment with good music, cute moments minus the cheap/overzealous comedy. And you will not be disappointed.



Overall : A Definite Watch.



Feel-O-Meter: 7.5/10

Khichdi: Over Cooked

I have always been a crazy die hard khichdi fan and as soon as i saw the promos on air, decided to watch it first day. And That's what i did. The promos were fabulous and all the jokes (in those 5-6 different promos) were crazily funny. The problem is, those were ALL the funny moments in the movie. If you have seen the promos, you have seen it all. The problem with the jokes is that if you have heard it earlier, it might be the craziest joke ever, but it just sound the same, its just not as funny as the first time. Exactly what happens here, the jokes are neat but since ALL of these were already shown in the ads, they just dont feel 'khichdi' enough. I just love the crazy nonsense on the TV series and have hardly missed an episode. But the movie is not even 10% of the series. May be because the story/script was funny only for half an hour but it got stretched to 2 hours. If you havent seen any of the promos and are a khichdi fan. MAY Go and watch if you have absolutely nothing to do and get free tickets and ride to a good cinema hall along with popcorn, drinks etc.



I think apart from the lack of (number of ) funny moments, another problem was that the movie was too dependent on prafull and hansa. But their chemistry, no matter how good it is, cannot compensate for (overall) bad writing. The stage was set from the initial draft of the story itself. I mean take the funniest gujju family in India, Add to it some sardaars and try to have a marriage between the two. But sadly, the execution did not live up to the story expectations. The script just did not have that punch. Mind you, i am not saying that the jokes were not funny, but at the end of the day you are watching a movie and not a re-run of a laughter challenge show. So those jokes have to be told 'through' the script. I expected a lot more idiocy, lot more goof, lot more over the top humor, lot more slapstick. But sadly, none of it came true. Infact, with in the first half an hour i got bored and started looking at my watch because the story was not going anywhere.



One the performance front Prafull and Hansa rock, but thats the problem. They are the only characters which are funny and they are not the center of the script. To be honest, i think the producer who also playing the lead role has something to do with it. May be he just wanted to put HIM in the limelight, so he made a movie keeping him as the central character. JD should realize that he is NOT funny and no matter how desperately he tries, he just CANNOT be. So he should have given more space to the characters who are. Had he kept Prafull and Hansa in the middle and made a story AROUND them, it would be much funnier. The Jayshree cast replacement also did not help either. The actor who plays the role in the movie is not even 10% of the original. The only funny thing i could find was to do with a perfect (mis)casting of a pretty hot damsel in the role of a perfect sardarni bimbo. To be honest, she looked too good to be dumb and definitely did not have any sardarni-sh demeanors about her. The Sardar cliches were too.. hmmmm... cliched..



Overall: A thumbs down if you are a khichdi fan. A big disappointment. Wish they come up with another one but with prafull and hansa in the center of the storyline. As far as this is concerned, Would advise to watch the re runs of the TV series on youtube instead or watch the trailer @ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=asS1nFf3CjY. That should be good enough :)



Overall : 2/10 (For the 4-5 ammmazingly funny jokes here and there)