Mostly, a Woman is not BEHIND a successful man, but AFTER him
June 21, 2011
June 5, 2011
June 4, 2011
Ready : 'Ready' for some Rubbish?
So? Are you Ready? Ready for some ridiculousness? Ready for absolute nonsense? Ready for bad acting? Ready for Worse writing? Ready for an absolutely trash movie? Ready for the kind of movie which is not funny in any way? Then Please go ahead and watch ready this weekend. Need i say more? Overall 1/10
As its said, you can make some people fool all the time, all people fool some time but not make a fool of all the people all the time. Ready proves the same point. You can deliver a dabangg once where people treat trash as style and make it a huge hit, but you can't do it again and again. Let me make it very clear (again), that i am not one of those pseudo intellectuals who only like 'International' cinema and do not appreciate 'Bollywood Masala'. I absolutely love the 'Brainless Comedies' (as this genre is descrined as). But I am against 'Brainless' movies which do not make you laugh but rather irritate you in every sequence. This is one of those.
I fail to understand, why after spending such a big amount of money on stars, songs & dance sequences, marketing etc the industry can't spend a little amount ( and some more time) on writing a movie. How can this kind of a shit be served after spending some 50 crores (if not more) on a movie? I mean, you give a 5 year old a script to write for a play and i am sure he/she could come up with something better.
The movie is just plain irritating and leaves you with a headache. It keeps yo uwondering throughout the length of the movie as to what's the point of making a movie like this. If you want to make people laugh then PLEASE make people laugh by writing a good script. Don't write crap and expect people to laugh because salman khan is delivering that crap. There is absolutely nothing in the movie that i liked. Salman is at his hamming best with desperate measures taken to make him feel stylish in any frame to ensure that people follow him just like Dabangg.
I would not bother to describe the plot here, since most would argue that in 'brainless' genre, it doesn't matter and same is the case here as well. As far as performances are concerned, EVERY actor is worse than the other. There is absolutely nobody (hmmm.. may be paresh rawal) who delivers the goods, but that's not because they perform bad, but just the fact that there is nothing they could do about the movie. With all the stupidities, With all the slapsticks, With all the (supposedly) Style Quotient, there is absolutely nothing for the actor to do. They could simply deliver the crap given to them and just hope that Salman could generate some buzz to ensure people come and watch the movie once.
The only saving grace according to me was the song Dhinka Chika (which is why the movie got that 1 rating out of 10). The song is absolutely crazy and there would be hardly anybody who can't get his heart/foot tapping for the song. It kinda reminds you of the Madrasi cinema and its craziness (in a good way). Its full Apadi Pode feel, takes the song to a different level altogether and is the only reason you might want to watch the movie to be honest.
Overall: Absolutely Rubbish. Don't watch it even if you have free tickets.
Feel-O-Meter: 1/10
PS: 1. I had free tickets to the movie, else i wouldn't have gone anyways. 2. I did not leave the hall only because i had to meet somebody after the movie. Else it would have been my (as far as i can remember) second movie walk out.
May 31, 2011
May 29, 2011
Hangover 2: 'Absolute'-ly funny but stuck in Vegas
The plot now shifts to Bangkok and everything else remains the same. In H1, Doug was getting married, in H2 Stu is. In H1 Doug gets misplaced, in H2 Stu's Bro in law Teddy. Rest all too remains the same. Stu falls again for a hooker (with a twist). Replace the baby from H1 with a Monkey. Like H1 Gangsters keep getting introduced. They (again) think that the lost person is kidnapped and find out that he isn't. Ehow they find Teddy is similar to H1. Basically, Every single thing remains the same with a different cast.
Although, the plot remains the same and even the gags and subplots. The story still has some really funny moments. The first half seems like H1 and at the time of interval you feel kinda cheated. You are like 'what the fuck ya, its the same movie only' but wouldn't leave coz you have this 'Chalo yaar next half mein its gonna be better' and it does. The second half comes up with some new crazy sequences and gags. Especially when Chow returns, he just picks up the movie and takes it to a different level altogether
Performance wise, (as expected) Allan (Zach Galifianakis) is the coolest. He has such a funny personality that even when he is doing nothing, he is funny. Ken Jeong as Mr Chow (as already updated) is the pick of the cast after Zach. There is something about him that lights up the screen and he is just amazingly funny even though he only comes for like 10 minutes and two sequences. Takes the cake. Bradley Cooper looks hot, Ed Helms looks the same poor guy. All rest are just about Okay.
Overall, In absolute terms a pretty funny movie, but suffers from the 'hangover' of the first movie's success and replicates just about everything. Still is quite funny. Go watch it with your friends
Feel-O-Meter: 6/10
Kung Fu Pnda 2 : Return of the Awesomenesss
This version is a story of another villain (who happens to be a white peacock) who gets hold of a cannon and starts destroying a town and then, Kung Fu. Po and the Furious Five have to stop them. Po though now believes that he is the dragon warrior but he is still the same physically. The movie also deals with Po's past and 'realization' (though tough to believe!) that he is not his father's (a duck who raised him) son.Then the movie takes a preachy turn of finding 'inner peace' and not worrying about the past and think about the present. Then a bollywood turn, where the villain had killed the parents of Po. And in the end, obviously Po along with the furious five beats the crap out of the villain and all live happily ever after (till the 3rd instalment releases)
As already established, the movie's awesomeness cannot be described in the review, since it rests heavily (very heavily) on situations and amazingly funny lines. The soul of the movie lies in the contradiction of a 'fat panda' being a hero. Just the idea of the panda fighting the bad guys is like, oh oh, is HE gonna fight 'em. Apart from the dialogues, the movie also scores on its vividness of color palette and neat animation. The actions is so quick and the pace of the movie so quick that you hardly notice other things and immerse yourself in the narration. Even though i saw it in 3D, woul,d recommend you to watch the 3D version to enjoy the colors more.
Also, i really really liked Po and the short story of his being fathered by the duck, Those scenes are sooooo awwww and cute that you are like, oh oh, why am i awwwwing so much but you can't seem to help. The young po is sooooo fuckin cute and he keeps eating and eating and eating.. I think those 5 minutes of the movie took the cake and even if you don't like the action bit, you are thoroughly going to enjoy it.
Overall: Do not forget to take your neice/nephew/son/daughter to the movie. In one word, its Awesommmmmmme
Feel-O-Meter: 8/10
May 21, 2011
Pyaar ka Punchnaama: Packs a 'Punch'
PKP is a story of 3 single friends who taste the forbidden fruit of being 'In a relationship'and things get 'Complicated'. One has a possessive 'typical' girlfriend getting onto his nerves. Second is still stuck up in an old relationship and third, a 'friend' who uses the guy like a doormat every now and then. The movie deals is their falling in 'love', realizing the 'gale ki haddi' stuck and then getting 'out of love'. More than the story its the sequences that matter and the small small things that the director adds to bring out the 'Reality of Relationships' make the movie tick.
The Real Hero of the movie according to me is the director Luv Ranjan. The way in which he brings out the 'fun' part from the daily mundane routine things is just phenomenal. He seems to be the friend that you had in your friend circle in college, who always had a witty one liner for something or the other. The guy who would keep you rolling on the floor with his timing and presence of mind. The way the script is written, it doesn't seem like a 2 and a half hour movie and just flows smoothly. Even in the second half when the movie turns on its head, he maintains that balance and the lack of comedy doesn't seem to bore you. Every single scene is like 'O Shit, this is soo true' types. And suddenly the second scene comes and you are like 'Fuck, this is like my story' and it keeps on repeating all throughout. It seems like he has had a real tough time in all his relationships and seems to find the funny part out of the suffering and portrays it onscreen. *Bow*
On the performances front, divyendu steals the cake. He is the one who takes the movie on his shoulder and you almost wait for him to come back and wish that he was the only character in the movie. His speech, his timing, his expressions, his 'feel' is nothing short of brilliance. One of THE finest comic performance that i have seen in a long long time. I just have one feeling for him: Respect. Nushrat Bharucha (LSD Fame) seems such a 'typical' girlfriend that you almost start hating her (if you are a guy). She is pretty good too. Rest all are just good enough for their roles and do not seem to be a misfit anywhere. All's well in the performance department.
Music is the weak link according to me. There is hardly any song that you would remember because of its music though the 'Kutta' track written (again) by Luv Ranjan strikes a chord but more because of its witty lyrics rather than music. If this one area could have been better, the movie could have been a 10/10 may be. Nothing spectacular about the technical departments and to be honest, i hardly noticed anything because i was too engrossed in the movie.
On the negative front, may be there could have been a couple of sequences which could have been avoided in the second half to accomodate a slightly elaborate ending. Towards the end, the movie just concludes (slightly) abruptly and you are like 'Yaar build up to accha tha, but ending thodi aur 'faadu' honi chahiye thi'. Music is not too great. And though the actors are good, it rides mostly on one actor, if the other actors had been better than 'just good enough', it could have been even better.
Overall: A must must watch for everybody. Especially for Divyendu's acting and Luv Ranjan's phenomenal direction and writing. Trust me, much better than the supposed 'comedies' which serve nothing more than cheap double meaning or slapstick shit.
Feel-O-Meter: 8/10
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May 14, 2011
Stanley ka Dabba: Verrry Tasty
The movie is about Stanley, his dabba gang and his ever hungry teacher. Stanley doesn't bring his own dabba to school since his mother is not in town and has his lunch with his school friends. The 'Khadoos' teacher always scolds him for the same, since he likes to eat the kids' lunch daily himself. Sounds like a stupid plot, right? Wait till you watch the movie. And Be Ready for a twist in the last 5 minutes of the movie. THAT just turns the movie on its head and makes every moment of confusion and wait worth every bit of it. Trust me on this one.
The movie has a strange warmth about it, that is kept up throughout. This warmth gives you a kinda cozy feeling. Its like a quilt in the delhi winters. Its gives you the same feeling that you get, when you are cuddling with some one close. The same warmy/cozy/sweet feeling. I does get nostalgic at more than one occassions but no dose of forced nostalgia is felt anywhere. It does not feel heavy anywhere. Every sequence. Every Dialogue. Everything about the movie was like a relaxing Kerala Ayurveda Massage.
The most brilliant thing about the movie was the 'ease' at which the kids 'acted'. The kids never looked Plasticky like those on TV Serials and Reality Shows. The kinda kids who have grown up too quickly. These kids are different. Its surprising to see them performing the way they do. To be honest, in none of the sequences, it felt as 'acting'. It felt like they were just interacting with each other. Full points to Amol on that. I guess, he would have given the kids a free hand to do what they wanted to do and just given them a broad guideline. I am not even sure if the kids 'knew' they were being filmed. May be they were just rehearsing and Amol shot the sequences. This could have given the 'non-acting' performances by the kids.
To be honest, I don't have words to describe how i feel about the movie. I think whatever i write about the movie, it would not be able to do justice to the movie. Its like an experience more than a movie. Also, on the negative side, for about 15 minutes just before the last 10 minutes of the movie, you start to feel 'whats the point of this movie' and suddenly 'It all starts to make sense'. Those 15 minutes could have been grippier. But that does not take anything away from the movie.
Overall: A Lighthearted, Sweet Movie with no preachiness factored in. Watch it for the sheer coziness of it. Absolute Recommendation
Feel-O-Meter : 8/10
Ragini MMS: All Sleaze No Scare 3/10
First things First, the movie did not scare me AT ALL. There was absolutely no sequence that i can recall where i was 'scared'. Not even a single 'o Fuck or o shit' moment anywhere. And its not because 'I' was not scared, infact there was no gasps in the whole cinema hall. Infact, a lot of people were cracking jokes at the supposed 'Scary' Moments. So the horror didn't work.
Now, comes the second offering from the movie. Sleaze. It worked a bit at the start especially when you notice the cute Kainaz Motivala in her shorts. But then, it all became too repeated where random kissing sequences became too frequent and the guy's repeated KLPD moments became a norm than an exception. After like the first half an hour, it all looks like a desperate B grade Ramsay Movie than anything else. You seem to get more irritated than excited. Just because the lead actors abuse in every sentence doesn't make the movie 'cool and sexy' too. Its just gets too sleazy and leaves a bad taste in mouth (Pun intended)
As already explained, the 'Ghost' being shown in make up it even less effective and once you have the age old 'A woman was killed in this home' premise makes it even more facepalm-ish. The shaky camerawork tries hard to do a paranormal activity-Blair Witch-LSD-127 hours combination but to be honest, its just an attempt and does not impress anywhere.
On the performance front, RajKumar Yadav if Fantastic. Absolute Killer performance by the guy. 10/10 from me there. Kainaz looks damn damn damn cute, but even the thought of such a beautiful/petite/cute/harmless girl being stuck in a house with a ghost doesn't bring out any emotions given her limited acting abilities which are used to the minimum, barring a couple of long kisses, some cleavage/boob show and yeah, looooooong screams.
Overall: A BIG disappointment. Doesn't Scare. is Sleazy. Tries hard to be too 'experimental' . Has damn good performance by one actor but ends up being a B grade Ramsay Rip off rather than an edge of the seat drama. Give it a Miss.
Feel-O-Meter : 3/10
May 2, 2011
May 1, 2011
April 30, 2011
Shor In the City: Makes the right noise
The movie's plot revolves around 3 (and a half) stories. One, the story of three friends who are lukkhe bambaiya one of whom has a business of printing pirated books (ethically btw) and who help each other out in times of distress and how they steal a bag from a local train to find a couple of desi guns and an AK 47/56 along with a bomb and their rather funny adventures. Two, a struggling cricketer who wants to marry his girlfriend but doesn't have a career yet since he hasn't been selected in Maharashtra team coz he doesn't have the money to grease palms. Three, a US Return entrepreneur being harassed by some local bhais for extortion. And the half story of the pirated books printing guy (from the first story) and his relationship with his newly wedded wife. And as you would have guessed it, all the stories meet towards the end to complete the picture, even though the protagonists from the 3 stories never meet !! I'm more or less sure that you wouldnt have got a clue of the stories even after my mention here. And to be honest, the movie is not about the stories per se, its about the relationships, the hardships, the funny moments, the crying times and everything in between.
The best part about the movie is that it doesn't try too hard to do anything. It doesn't try to be too funny or too emotional or too apologetic or too 'oh poor baby'ish anywhere. It keeps its balance perfectly and doesn't let you get bored through most parts. Especially the story of the 3 friends and their adventures is very interesting and more than 60% of the 'goods' are delivered in that part particularly. The directors do a perfect job and managing the overall pace of the movie. No where you get that 'arey yaar ab yeh thoda zada ho gya' feeling. It just flows so smoothly that you hardly notice the time. Though i still think that the NRI story could have been done slightly better and it gets boring for say 15 minutes in the middle but quickly picks up its pace in the second half and a power packed climax. All's well that ends well i say.
On the performance front, i think Pitobash (who plays one of the 3 friends from the first story), Take him out and the movie would have fallen on its face. Tushar Kapoor does a decent job as well along with the girl who plays his wife. Hmmm, on second thoughts, even apart from the above mentioned, all the other guys do a good job and nowhere you feeel that such and such person is a miscast or somebody else could have done a better job. Everybody plays one's part exactly the way it should have been played. One of the finest overall performances after i guess Rajneeti last year
Music is brilliant along with the background score. Especially Saibo and Karma is a Bitch (or what ever the song is called). Saibo has such a soothing feel that you feel like listening to it on loop all by yourself sitting in the balcony with no one to disturb, One of the finest songs this year with no 'too much sufi-ish' feel. Just about perfect. I think hardly anybody would be able to hold on to their shoulders while Karma is a Bitch plays. It has that groovy feel that brings a smile on your face when it plays. I couldn't find any problems in any other department too given the fact that the movie went soo smoothly that i hardly noticed anything great or bad.
Overall: A Definite watch this weekend. Watch it for the immaculate direction. Fresh Treatment and Amazing performances.
Feel-O-Meter : 7.5/10
April 23, 2011
Dum Maaro Dum: Jhel Saale Jhel 4/10
The problem with the movie was on multiple counts. First and the most prominent was on the direction front, the director had absolutely no clue whether he wanted to make a docu-drama or a masala flick or an action packed adventure or a suspense thriller. So what you do? Try everything and end up making a confused movie. There was too much 70s in the movie, with Zameer ki Awaaz, Mari hui Biwi ki Awaaz, Kabristaan, So many characters, Stupid Suspense (and character names). First he tries to make it a kinda docu-drama on the drugs circle of Goa and takes inspiration from some of the drug/drunk shots from Dev D and tries to make it 'cool' and fails. Then he tries to make it sweet story of a couple who were once in love and fails. Then he tries to make it a melodramatic family died in accident and i am repenting kinda story and fails. He tries to make it a socio-politico-ethical-economic and god knows what else drama and fails.In the end, he wants to make it a suspense thriller where everyone is searching for one guy and which was like the last 'Keel' in the coffin and 'Kills' the movie.
The movie starts with a sweet li'l story of a couple (especially the guy) who wants to go abroad to study and can't go coz he got no money and he gets into the Goa Drug Mafia's haath and screws up his life. Then comes the story of a ex-corrup cop (or a corrup ex-cop or an ex-corrup ex-cop) who has lost his family in a bizarre accident and the dead wife speaks to him on more than one occassion in the film. Then there is a love story of a couple wherein the girl has left the guy to be a pseudo-rakhail of the kingpin of the drug mafia. Add to that, some cheap sex, loads of drug addiction, nigerian-algerian-russian-british-local drug mafia and their problems and a character who nobody knows anything of. A lot to digest? Wait till you watch the movie.
On the performance front, Abhishek tries his best (or worst) at the Raavan inspired hamming and does it the way only he can. Bipasha does what she is supposed to do. Flaunt some cleavage, wear a white shirt (look ma, no pants), show those digitally (or surgically) enlarged breasts and other muscles and hmmm.. thats it. Prateik does a good job being whatever he was supposed to be but who cares right? Rana Dagubatti could have delivered a good performance and would have won the best actor award if there were only two heroes left in the industry- him and john abraham. The dubbed hindi voice doesnt help. There are a few others who i don't even remember so just leave it at that and Deepika's trashy dance number makes you almost puke, so i guess better not to say anything on that front too.
Music is bad and tries to ride on a single song 'Te Amo' which plays like 15986 times in the movie as a background score. Rest nothing to mention. Enough has been said about the lyrics, so won't waste anytime there. The cinematography tried a Dev D but a copy is a copy right? The awkward angles became too awkward in the end and did not do anything for me. Script had absolutely no clue, there were characters being introduced every 15 minutes and nobody gave a damn about it. It jumps from here and there and does not make any point.
It was a good movie on paper with a strong story but the direction (or lack thereof) killed it. Make it again without the glamour and big star cast on a small budget. I am sure it will be a bigger success and a better movie. A bit tad long too. The movie has a couple of moments here and there which are like good but then all that is washed away coz of all the style which the director just wanted to be there. So sab kare dhare pe paani types.
Overall: Would Not Recommend to anybody, especially given the summer. Take out some old Hindi Movie and watch it on DVD at home.
Feel-O-Meter: 4/10
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